That Time I Manifested My Dream Home
This title would annoy me if I saw it. Please know....this post is not look at my perfect life.
1. My life is far from perfect.
2. I’m sharing to show what happens when you let possibility in. Stay with me ok?
Manifestation can feel like this airy word with no real world application. Kind of like... if I just wish and pray for that perfect person, position or pay check it appears right? Sort of....
That’s half of it. You see I get all crazy for possibility because it’s where manifestation begins it’s literally opening the door to what you desire. As soon as you feel the pull of possibility you start to think of ways to make it so. And once you start thinking of ways, you start researching ways and once you start researching you start doing and once you start doing, well you can imagine where this story is going right?
So let me bring this back to the title. We moved to Redmond, Washington in the summer of 2015 for my husband’s job, which was damn near close to a dream job.
As soon as we landed there I felt heavy. I assumed it was me, that I needed to make friends, join Fit 4 Mom and dig deeper into my work. While some of those offered temporary relief, the pit in my stomach remained. I cried a lot. To boot... my sadness felt unjustifiable. Was I an ungrateful asshole incapable of happiness?
Noooo! I really need this point to be illuminated because so often we assume if we have the life we are suppose to love we are suppose to love it, but it doesn’t always work that way and it’s ok. I repeat... it’s ok.
So here I am feeling all the stuck. We just bought a house, my husband was loving his job. Husband didn’t necessarily love where we lived, but he didn’t hate it either- plus he had THE job. I was working out of our home with a then almost 2-year-old, so my world was a house that did not feel like home. Eventually the sadness got really heavy, so husband sent me on a girls’ trip to Phoenix (a place I use to live and love).
The trip opened the door to possibility. I felt pieces of my spirit return, which planted the seed to see past stuck. Maybe we didn’t have to stay. Yes, it looks crazy, but it’s way crazier to live a life you don’t love. No?
I returned home and shared my desire to move. Share is such a nice way of putting it. I was a vocal beast about it. Possibly too vocal, but Lawd I couldn’t drop it.
I felt my spirit in Phoenix, so I assumed that’s where we were suppose to move even though that was not Keith’s (husband) place of choice. But Keith being the selfless soul he is applied for jobs like cray there. This went on for a year. You know the rollercoaster... of omg is this the one? stalking Redfin, enrolling Elliot in Preschool (I may have put the cart before the horse on that one) and imagining my kiddos playing in our front yard with my best friend’s nuggets. I planned + plotted + imagined myself in my dream life. No joke. It was nearly all I thought about. While Keith was working to make it happen.
Despite me visualizing like a maniac and Keith applying and networking like crazy, NOTHING HAPPENED.
I decided we needed to go there as a family, so we did, we rented an Air B&B and played house. I took visualization next level and put myself IN my visualization.
And guess what? Despite loving the guts out of my friends and my deep affection for Phoenix…. It didn’t feel right. I could not imagine us as a family there. I couldn’t see Keith thriving there.
Trust me I tried to ignore this inkling. I felt like such a turd confessing this revelation to Keith.
Soooo... If not Phoenix, where? I felt directionless and homeless, but I didn’t feel hopeless. And that’s when the magic began. In that moment, I handed the keys over to the Universe… Alright, I surrender you drive. Through the 15+ months of visualizing and sifting through my desires, my requests were good and known by senor Universe, so I altered my request to... this or something better. You, see he was gunning for better. I had no idea what better was, ‘cause you don’t know what you don’t know. I just focused on the way I wanted to feel in my life, and let homeboy work out the details.
A few months later Keith was approached by a recruiter from a really rad company. The drawback... it was in Silicon Valley. Neither one of us were itching to move there, but Keith went on the interview merely because he likes interviewing. Weirdo. He never thought he would get the job. He got the job. His first reaction was to say No and I was like, hang tight, let’s explore. So explore we did and we discovered Santa Cruz, close enough to Silicon Valley, but with all the things we were craving, so Keith accepted the offer. We literally had no idea if we could afford this or if this was the right move, but trust. Just trust.
Within 2 months we found a house that somehow combined EVERYTHING we were looking for in the most ideal location, accept it needed some serious design love, but I love me some design, so even that felt like a win. This house was at the tippy top of our budget, so there was going to be no renovating in the near future, but TRUST. Six days after we closed (meaning the house is officially ours) a pipe burst in the kitchen and because nobody was living there water was spewing and sitting for hours. Nearly the entire kitchen + living room floors were destroyed. Keith was destroyed for a few minutes too. I was excited. I mean the chances of us renovating a kitchen with two little kids is slim to none, soooo looks like we’re doing this. I mean none of our stuff was there and it ended up working out that insurance covered half of the bill + paid for us to live in a rental for the months during a renovation. Yes, this was a pain in the ass, but a small price to pay for a kitchen of your dreams.
I never in a million years thought I would live in California (somehow it always just seemed out of the cards) or having the kitchen I pinned and here I am sitting with both and it all started with possibility. ALL OF IT. So I really am standing here, asking you to see what’s possible. Because once you see it watch the F out!
Helping you see what’s possible,